The Halfdivorce


The Halfdivorce

Whores go to pimps and Littlefinger is the biggest pimp in the realm. Tyrion needed the High Septon, not a local nobody septon to annul his marriage that was consummated and legal.

Tyrion’s marriage to Sansa Stark is null and void as she has a ruthless pimp of a divorce lawyer who has an expert witness in his pocket, Tysha the Sailors Wife.

Tyrion is still married to Tysha. The marriage was legal, consensual, consummated and overseen by a Septon of the faith.

“[Divorce is] pretty much unheard of. But marriages can be annulled or set aside for a variety of reasons.”- GRRM on his notablog

As divorce is basically “unheard of” your local septon cannot grant one, especially after it has been consummated and the two parties are of sound mind and the age of consent. It is also unseemly for a powerful lord to pressure a Septon to do his bidding and setting the marraige aside. Only the High Septon himself would have the authority to grant this divorce. Not the insignificant local Septon that Tywin threatened or bribed.

Where do whores go is the riddle plaguing Tyrions life. Whores go to pimps. Pimps send them by the docks where sailors visit. You will not find more docks than at Braavos. And this prostitute strangely has to marry every man in a bizarre ceremony before she beds them. This mirrors the treatment Tywin gave her, a lie Jaime confirmed by turning her into an actual prostitute, accepting gold for sleeping with the Lannister men and then Tyrion at the end.

The Sailor’s Wife is a prostitute who works at the Happy Port brothel in Braavos. She only beds those who marry her. She has a fourteen year old daughter named, Lanna,  for Lannister. The Sailors Wife is Tysha and Lanna is their legitimate daughter and upon Tywins death and Tyrions disinheritance for kinslaying, Lanna is heir to Casterly Rock. Her name is basically Lannister and is the feminized version of the Lannisters name.

More evidence that Lanna is a Lannister is found in in the name of Roberts’ bastard baby in the whorehouse was named Barra, for Barratheon.

She had light red hair and a powdering of freckles across the bridge of her nose, and when she slipped free a breast to give her nipple to the babe, he saw that her bosom was freckled as well. “I named her Barra,” she said as the child nursed. “She looks so like him, does she not, milord? She has his nose, and his hair …”

“She does.” Eddard Stark had touched the baby’s fine, dark hair. It flowed through his fingers like black silk. Robert’s firstborn had had the same fine hair, he seemed to recall.

Tysha is in Littlefingers employ in his brothel in Braavos. He may present her, coupled with the fact their marriage was not consummated to annul a wedding on the grounds Tyrion is a polygamist. We can come to this conclusion through a couple steps. First Littlefinger tells Sansa he hid the Penny and her brother, the jousting dwarves. See this exchange between Sansa and Littlefinger.

“Tell me of the feast. The queen took such pains. The singers, the jugglers, the dancing bear . . . did your little lord husband enjoy my jousting dwarfs?” “Yours?”

“I had to send to Braavos for them and hide them away in a brothel until the wedding. The expense was exceeded only by the bother. It is surprisingly difficult to hide a dwarf, and Joffrey . . . you can lead a king to water, but with Joff one had to splash it about before he realized he could drink it. When I told him about my little surprise, His Grace said, ‘Why would I want some ugly dwarfs at my feast? I hate dwarfs.’ I had to take him by the shoulder and whisper, ‘Not as much as your uncle will.’

So Penny is connected to that brothel which Littlefinger probably owns as he just about is the only pimp introduced to us thus far. And he is by far the richest.

It is through Penny that I think Tyrion will hear the the story of the Sailors Wife in The Winds of Winter.

Divorces are a bloody thing. A bloody expensive thing. But a Lannister always pays his debts.

While the Eyrie is impregnable against armies, it is quite vulnerable to dragons. It will not be impregnable to Tyrion flying in on Viserion.

In his first divorce payment to Sansa, wife of Harrold Hardying-Arryn, Tyrion will repay her with another debt he owes. Remember his promise to Gunthor son of Gurn, of the Vale Storm Crows? It was quite literally a bloody oath for the price for his life:

What would you give us for your lives, Tyrion son of Tywin? Swords? Lances? Mail?” “All that, and more, Gunthor son of Gurn,”Tyrion Lannister replied, smiling.

“I will give you the Vale of Arryn.”

Update: Modesty Lannister thinks it may be Timett son of Timett is the rightful king. Long live King Timett son of Timett, King of of the Mountain and Vale of Timett.


2 thoughts on “The Halfdivorce

  1. why would he send for them in Braavos and then hide them in a brothel in Braavos? Wouldn’t “sending for them in Braavos” imply that they were hid in Kings Landing after being sent for?


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